When I was younger my sister and I had a teeter totter in the backyard.
I liked it. Up and down in the air I’d go, my feet safely touching the ground. Sometimes one of us would stand up and leave the other dangling up in the air, or even jump off which would produce a stinging jolt on the butt if you didn’t react quick enough! There was always anticipation when dangling in the air…would my sister jump off or not? It was a little scary, but fun, unless I didn’t react quick enough. Even if I get a stinging jolt, it was short-lived and didn’t stop us from enjoying the ride over and over. (I will confess it was more fun when she was the one in the air.)
I have thought about teeter totters this week.
I feel like I have ridden a teeter totter of emotions lately, up in the air, kicking my legs at the height, enjoying the peaceful ebbs of the ups and downs when things are balanced, but also experiencing a few jolts that bring a sting.
Now, to be fair, there is the menopause thing going on. I think menopause is its own teeter totter, physically and emotionally.
But so you get a sense of the ride lately, this is what is going on.
We had been praying about what God wanted us to do and where He wanted us to be for over a year now. I felt like we were in a holding pattern.
We waited. I wish I could say I was always patient during the process.
I tried. I failed some days. I tried, again.
Up and down. Highs and lows.
Somewhere during the waiting process, my prayers changed to being more thankful. When you are stressed about things, praying thankful prayers doesn’t come naturally. At least it didn’t/doesn’t for me. But, once I started, it became easier. It was easier to see how much to be thankful for. I had neglected to remind myself, He was the one that had always taken care of us. He had always provided a place for us, and means for us and a way for us. I just needed to trust Him.
Trust – that thing that can be so hard for me to do at times.
Trusting Him means being giving over: self, marriage, children, family, friends, home, finances, pets, possessions, community, work, hobbies, ministries, everything.
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jer. 29:11
When we moved here we thought it would be for a short time.
That was over 19 years ago.
God has other plans for us now.
I don’t believe in coincidences. I believe in God-incidences. Seemingly out of “nowhere” hubby got a call about a job that they wanted to talk to him about. At the same time, our youngest got a job offer in his desired field and has moved out.
So we are officially empty nesters.
We are working, cleaning out, down-sizing, and moving.
20+ years of stuff to go through – need I say more?
We continue to worship with a church community that has been a source of spiritual growth, trusting Him for our next church community.
We are watching others step up to the ministry of helping the homeless in our area that we have been a part of for 3 years as we wait to see what ministry opportunities He has in store for us.
We are saying our goodbyes to friends, not knowing if/when our paths will cross again.
Laughter and tears. Tears and laughter.
Up and down, up and down I’ve been riding the emotional teeter totter lately. Some days I am better at it than others.
This morning I was reminded of these words:
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me – put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you. Phil 4:4-9
He’s got this. He is in control of the teeter totter.
My feet are lifted off the ground, I trust you Lord as you take me up and I trust the stings. What I think are stings are just your mercies towards blessings on the ride. When I look back at the ride, it is then I see your mercy and the ride is that much sweeter.