I was following a blog that was both encouraging and informative. The posts dealt with her Mother’s battle with Alzheimers Disease. Right now, I don’t know someone battling that, but I do have a dear friend who cares for her mother-in-law that battles dementia. I thought the authors posts were well written and would find humor, encouragement and interest in what she would say. I say her posts “dealt” with because she doesn’t blog anymore. She had to stop because of “prying internet eyes”. I don’t know what her past mistakes were that made her feel she must stop, I’m not judging her. I know what she is today, by her words and the love she shows to her family. Besides, I have my own past and mistakes. Don’t we all? “We have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God”. I miss Sally’s posts. And I often wonder how her Mother is doing.
My blog posts before they make it to WordPress, generally start out written by hand, in a spiral journal, scribbled hastily, crossed out if using pen, erased if in pencil, sometimes with extra notes, written exactly the way they are in my head, even if it doesn’t make sense….even to me. The erasers and cross-outs happen when I read what I wrote. Sometimes that’s a big mistake, my mind goes off in a whole other direction!
Some don’t make it here. Well, truth be told….
A lot, don’t make it here.
I am still keenly aware of unknown “eyes” reading what I write. Well, while I realize there isn’t probably hardly anybody reading what I write, there is always the possibility of “someone” being able to read it. Most of the time I don’t even know who that “someone” is.
Look, I know my English and Grammar isn’t the best. I know there are great blogs with “Helpful Hints” and posts to help and all that. Honestly, I read them. I do. However, I don’t want to be an English Major. If I write, it is because I just want to write. I do try to do a semi-decent job of “dot the i’s and all that”, but I’m not publishing a book here. If I was, I’d want an editor for that! It’s that old “people-pleasing” tendency that rears it’s ugly head, when I don’t post something because I fear what people might think. Well, there, that’s full disclosure there for ya!
Those “internet eyes”.
There is this underlying tendency (that at least I have) that I want to be transparent, but pride sometimes just gets in the way of completely baring it all.
So, if I can’t be completely transparent on here, then I don’t post something I have in my journal. It’s not like I’ve written some great mystery or scandal or something, it is usually when I get in a funk and have that “write what I’m thinking about saying to someone” discussion who has hurt me even if I haven’t seen them in a long time. I might have written words in anger or written words that do more harm than good, so what would be the point of that? Especially when I know the person I’m writing about probably wouldn’t read it anyway. That is when it is better to just lay those words at His feet.
I wonder if other bloggers feel the same way? It’s hard to blog about your life. It’s hard to be real about your life and talk about the lessons you’ve learned without talking about people in specifics. A little while ago I posted about a blogger that is real specific about her family. They aren’t speaking now.”Disowned” were her words. I hope that they can reach some reconciliation. I find there is such a fine line walking with our words honestly and still seeking to be loving in their delivery. We are all a screwed up bunch of people hopefully trying to become what we are supposed to be. Anybody that says they got it all together is either lying to you, themselves, or both.
It’s much easier to write about other things. Things that aren’t personal. Is that why there are many “how to”, “pet themed”, “travel”, or other “none personal” blogs? Life is the theme for me. I read about all those other things, and I’ll even post about them sometimes, but I’m drawn to the personal. I’m drawn to the community of those being real.
How do I pick the blogs I follow? I have no rhyme or reason. I might be drawn to it on WordPress by the title or a picture. Someone might like a post of mine, I’ll check theirs out, someone I know blogs, or I’ll find it on Pinterest. Why I stay with blogs is for a reason. I stay with blogs for content, information, enjoyment, and/or the encouragement.
Here are just some of the blogs I follow and why. Stop by their pages, I’m sure my fellow bloggers will enjoy having you visit!
I really enjoy reading what is happening in Bulgaria with Patrecia a.k.a Miss Whiplash at I’ve Been Thinking About…. She seems to have mastered being able to laugh at the “internet eyes” and posts what she is thinking about. I feel like I am sitting in Bulgaria with her having a “cuppa” tea and a good old chat. When she doesn’t post, I worry that she is alright.
For information on helpful hints, organization, cleaning and other assorted things, I read Jillee’s posts on OneGoodThing.
A new urban farm and homesteading blog is Dirty Goat Farm. Rebecca & Keith (names you may recall from Operation Soup & Smokes) blog about their farm, homemade laundry products, canning and other stuff. Rebecca blogs the way she talks, I can vouch for that….I like that.
Mark at Docmarks Place Blog and Jeanne over at Jeanne’s Blog…A Nola Girl At Heart are great places for words of encouragement. More than once their words have matched my own devotional reading. I love it when God does that! Jeanne also has some great ideas for around the home and posts beautiful pictures and links to some great music.
Because of our interest in feeding the homeless, I follow Saints on the Street, a blog about a homeless ministry in Fort Wayne, Indiana. The names and location may be different, but the need is the same.
I visit my friend Courtney to read about life with a larger family and some cute munchkins at Life on Courtney Lane.
I just recently started following two new bloggers so I can hopefully help encourage them to continue. They are going to post about cupcakes/baking and reading. You can check Carmen and Grace out at Reading and Sweeting. I mean cupcakes and stuff…yum! I get hungry for one when I look at them! I’m looking forward to seeing what they write.
There are some other bloggers I follow that haven’t posted for a while, I’ll be happy to give them a shout-out when they post again or let you know when I find some other great ones!
Most if not all of the blogs I follow weave their lives into their posts. They encourage me to continue to do the same. So, I guess I’ll keep scribbling my posts, striving to be transparent. You can’t get “right” about something until you are “real” about it “internet eyes” and all.
Here’s to the life story bloggers! Happy blogging!